Who? What? Where? When? How? WHY?

That's me. I ask A LOT of questions. Just ask my husband, he will tell you all about it. When we were dating, he would say, "The next thing you're gonna ask is 'Why is the sky blue?'". I don't know why I have been given this questioning nature, but I have. I think that it is a nature that many women share. I tend to talk to the Lord a lot. And myself. Out loud. My boys will ask me, "Who are you talking to momma?". It is a hard thing not knowing the "why" sometimes, but I must remember that God knows. I believe everything does happen for a reason, but that reason is not known in the moment, it usually takes a lot of hindsight to see even a glimpse of it. I didn't know how I was going to make it through my mom's sickness and death, but I did. I didn't know Scott's brother would pass away the same day as my mom. I couldn't imagine how we would cope with a double loss, but we did. I didn't know what to do about my dad being so distraught over losing my mom. I didn't know he would take such drastic measures to be with her sooner than he should have, but he did. I don't know why he thought he couldn't go on. I don't know when the loss will get easier. I think I'm better than a year ago, but maybe I'm not. I know that I have peace that can only come from God, the kind of peace that the Bible talks about, that transcends all understanding. There is no way I could function otherwise. There are some questions I hear answered through a quiet whisper to my soul. Ones like "Why must I go through this?"...and He answers "Because you cannot become who I need you to be without these trials." Or this one, "Lord you know the desires of my heart, why do you not answer my prayers?" He answers, "The time has not yet come....My timing is perfect".  I thank the Lord that he does give me answers, I just have to remember that it might not be the answer I want to hear. I can go to His word and find comforting verses in times of trails and tribulations, knowing that He speaks to me and I must be careful to pray His will for my life.

One question I have learned the answer to: Why was I never able to get pregnant? Because He called me to be a mom through adoption! I would not change a thing. I have been blessed with the two most amazing boys! Yes, hindsight IS 20/20!!

As an ongoing battle to become a better daughter of the Lord, I ask Him daily to help me be less inquisitive (okay, I'll just say it...NOSY)....and accept things as they are without trying to analyze everything....and as a bonus, my husband will be a happy man!

I will make an effort to practice my motto daily:

 "It is what it is, and it's gonna be what it's gonna be."

Friends, remind me of that when I ask a dumb question....